Dear sweet Vecna I have been an idiot. You see, I brought minions with me through the portal, about 15 of them to be specific, mainly in preparation for my world-conquering plans. They are the most rigorously trained fighting force on the old world, every day working up their bodies and minds to steamroller this world with me as their leader, my glorious army shining as a beacon of darkness through a sea of light! They are also currently bored out of their skulls. They're getting bored with the TV I installed in their barracks, and most of them can't really read very well, so giving them books is out of the question. So, in the interest of preventing a boredom-induced mutiny, I let them go out and explore the town, making sure to scry on them through my crystal ball to intervene if they screwed up and telling them that if they didn't keep the "We're very avid cosplayers" ruse I would destroy them.
I really, really should not have let them do that. It was a disaster, everyone was screwing up. The Orcs were going on a raging bender, almost destroying the bar before I showed up, the Gnolls tried to rob a butcher shop and the stupid freaking goblins went on a stinking joyride! The one drow though was actually fairly decent, although he was buying a worrying amount of Rohypnol bottles. You do not know how close a call it was, trying to teleport on each and every stupid stinking one of them. And the amount of gold I had to spend to keep them from calling the cops, not to mention the repair spells (Cleverly camouflaged by yours truly pretending to do hit things with a wrench as the spell worked its magic).
And if you're wondering how the goblins know how to drive a car when they haven't been in this world for very long, turns out they can't. I had to wrestle the wheel away from them when I teleported in. Turns out I can't drive either. At least I was able to cause less damage, and for some reason they called me a hero for saving (or at least making sure it was still salvageable) their car from those "midget ruffians" ( I swear to Torog that's what they actually said).
And I am never giving the Orcs booze after this! They would have turned the bar to rubble if I hadn't come along! I mean, it was like a pack of monkeys. They drank the whole damn bar dry, even the cleaning fluid! And two of them I found stuffed into the Centipede machine! I didn't even know they could contort like that!
From now on, I'm chaperoning them on their little trips out to make sure this never happens again. That and I'm giving them half-rations for a month, since they technically didn't break the ruse, but still need to be punished. And I am throwing away all that rohypnol, since god knows what that Drow is going to do with it.